The Interwebs > Applebough

I was recently contacted by THE Applebough regarding his blog. He was concerned over a comment by someone named Inishi about the lack of activity on his blog recently and wanted to set the record straight:

I regret to inform my legions of loyal readers that my blog may remain un-updated for some period of time. It is not that I am too busy, as the fruit business has been suffering in Azeroth recently. It would seem that, with the new additions to the Tournament in Icecrown, my usual customers have chosen protein shakes from some no-name shop in Gadgetzan as a means of gaining their nutrition. While I cannot fault them for being concerned about their muscular welfare, I must say I have always considered fruit smoothies just as healthy and a thousand times more delicious... maybe I shall start a stand for fruit smoothies..... I have the supplies...

Alas, I digress. As I stated previously, my lack of activity cannot be attributed to a busy schedule, nor a lack of intriguing content to post.

No, the cold hard truth of the matter is..... I've forgotten my blasted password. And in the process of trying to recover it, I realized that I had also forgotten my username. To make matters worse, I have always posted from the Dalaran computer lab, and as most public lab users know, passwords are not saved on these machines.

It pains me greatly, but until I can recover this information or muster the energy to create an entirely new blog, Applebough's Fruitcart is suspended indefinitely.

I am going back to my empty fruit stand now. This month has been utterly depressing.

There you have it, folks. Right from the tree's.....um.... mouth. Here's hoping he can find his password and username, because I was looking forward to reading more about the war between Averna over at Nerf This Druid and Applebough.

Maintenance Day Shenanigans

Some of us troll the forums.

Some of us troll the chatrooms.

Some of us even go outside.

But seriously, why would you want to when you could sit at your desk and play with WoW Model Viewer?

Now, yeah, it's just full of the same things you see every day in Azeroth, so what could possibly be so exciting about it?

Remember encounters like Kael where your entire guild spent the first 10 minutes of every raid spamming /spit on the boss, because after months of attempts, you still had not managed to down him?

Wouldn't it be great if you could go back to Tempest Keep and humiliate the miserable bastard?

Well, you could, but it's maintenance day. Whatever shall you do? You need revenge!!!

You could......

.........

..... MAKE HIM DANCE!!!!!

No, you heard me correctly. Make. Kael. Dance.

"Womanizer" by Britney Spears, (c) Jive Records 2008.

(It's a little slow because of the compressor... but you get the idea.)

Yeah, who's a big shot now, eh? EH????

Unfortunately, Kael was such a terrible dancer that he crashed the program.

But, yeah, if you're finding yourself bored waiting for servers to come back up, go check out WoW Model Viewer. There are plenty of NPCs to embarrass, bwahaha.

An Open Letter to Astor Hadren....

Dear Astor Hadren:

Seriously, dude. I understand you're angry. I know I've killed you every time I go through Silverpine into Tirisfal, unaware that you actually have a purpose because you were so unfriendly to me when I was part of the Horde.

I promised myself and the rogues of Azeroth that never again shall the back of my hand your sunken face meet, but you had to do it, didn't you ....?

You know I can't remount in combat... and running is sooooo pre-level 30 (or soon to be 20).

So to all the would-be rogues who needed to murd------ er...... um, speak with you at 4am ST, I apologize.

But to you, Astor Hadren.... you asked for it. Pansy.

Spirit of Redemption: The Big Blue Angel of Fail

See bottom of the page for artist info!

Hey, priests. Have you ever done something silly, like misjudged the Heigan safety zones, or stood in the fire or runes of death, or been hit by flame wall? Sometimes we die of aggro before we even know we have it. Squishy like bad cheese. Bad..... smelly.... cheese.

Some classes have the privilege of a quiet, peaceful death. How many times have you been halfway through an encounter before you noticed another healer or a dps down? Sometimes things get crazy and you just don't see that person die. And unless that person says what happened to them, it's generally unknown until the RL asks or the log comes out.

Now, when we holy priests die, we turn into this big, beaaaautiful angel of awesome save-y-ness, right? We can cast as many heals as we want for free during those few seconds. We could die and save a raid at the same time, right??? Some priests even save raids when oom by suiciding and turning into the angel!!! Right????? RIGHT????

WRONG. So very.... very..... very wrong.

Iyenrith from the server Scarlet Crusade said it best on the priest forums:

You could always go discipline, but it's just not the same experience.

Death as Disc: "Splat. And a strange disappointment that you didn't turn into an angel"

Death as Holy: "My body transcends the physical world, as the beautiful angel rises off the ground in an act of defiance to the priest's attacker. Everyone stares in awe, and at that very moment you truly feel at one with your priest. Nothing matters but the majestic angel wings, not the raid, boss or even the angry screams over vent saying 'OMG HEAL WHILE IN ANGEL FORM!!'"

Yeaaaaaah.... that's exactly how it feels. I feel pretty and blue and sexy in my Queen Gorgo dress. I'm bigger than the raid boss, and sooo much hotter. And my heals? AWESOME.

Or are they....?

I got curious and checked the WWS for the last raid I was in, since I felt like my heals were kind of... well.... "meh" during spirit form. And damn...


OMG!!! I AM TEH LEET!!!! I healed for a grand total of 11!!! Whoooooo!!!!!!!! I could totally outheal every single *cough cough* rogue in the raid!!!!!! Now, granted, several of the deaths were on called wipes that I know not to heal in spirit form for, but still..... 11??? Really???

So yeah, we have so many better glyphs than the one that adds 6 seconds to spirit form, so I am not picking that up. I'm sure other priests do soooo much more healing in that form, and usually I at least manage to get a completely useless Guardian Spirit off, but blah. I guess I should just spam Renew.

And what's worse is that Miss Angelbutt makes it very obvious when we screw up. See that big blue angel that is covered in flames? Is that the Angel of Death??? Are we in Hell???

Nope, that's Fuyu. She was playing with the fire. d-^_^-b

I suppose at the very least, if you're bad at SoR (and I am very, very bad), then it still does one job: keeps you on your toes. Everyone is going to see you in the void zone when you are bigger than everything else in the room, and scantily clad at that. And there is nothing funnier than a massive wipe and multiple priests going into spirit form around the room.

All we need is for someone to play Alabama's Angels Among Us over Vent and my life will be complete.

**Thanks so much to p3p574r from DeviantArt, who was kind enough to let me use that gorgeous picture of Spirit of Redemption at the top of the page! She has some other equally gorgeous WoW art, so check her out here!!**